Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Being Single is OK, just don't get stuck in your ways.

It has officially been 10 days since I joined the "Single Mothers Club!" Though I was married I starting to feel single and now I know that's when you know shit is bad!  The only difference now is that I don't have a roommate. I finally get to do things my way for my child and I; according to the way I think it should be. It honestly feels so good to think for my own, on my own.  Yeah it's scary as hell, because there is nothing to fall back on. However,  when your the one everything fell on anyway why not face it alone? This little question is what makes people stay where they at now.  The fear of being and doing it on their own. Yeah the shit scary but, happiness is always better.

Becoming a single mother was never the goal, it never is for the women who wants a family and a "man." I separate  having a man, because though you have a family a man is suppose to make that family feel secure. Just like the women is suppose to be his back bone. I do say "suppose to" since in this day and age things seem to be drastically changing.  

Seems like a lot of people are about themselves. Everyone wants to get themselves right or get what they need.  Now that I have become single I see why! Less headache, less stress, less arguments. What I also learned is that this only cures you when your single. So many get so comfortable they neglect to try and fix themselves for another relationship. They get so caught up in the doing me faze that when it's time to get serious with someone they can't let certain habits go.  This little fact gets mixed up with "this is who I am."  Who you are and the way you do things are different.  This is when and where things get hard.  So most people end up staying in a horrible situation, by themselves, finding fuck buddies or jumping from relationship to relationship.  

How can this change? When people change themselves and figure out what they need.  The battle of want vs. want  and want vs. need. Confused? We all want something, which in most cases we really don't need.  If you figure out what's true to your heart and what you need, what you want will eventually come. A lot of single parents get this mixed up as well. They forget that it's not all about them.  Never neglect your happiness, however you defiantly have to think of what you need for you and your kids (some what).  I say some what because the battle of knowing if it's good for your kids or if your kids are just being spiteful and rebellious;  This can change a lot, so I won't even go there on this topic.

This seems like a lot and can be scary, but the point of it all is that being single is OK, just try not to get comfy and stuck in your ways with a list of non existing expectations.  


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